Internships and Insecurities

Well, despite the fact that it is in the title, I really don't have any news on any internships yet. But it relates to what's been going on lately, because the whole "lets-make-plans-for-summer" thing has been taking up a rather large portion of the energy my brain has that isn't focused on classes. Most of you probably already know this, but when something big is left undecided, or unsure, I tend to think myself into a state of stress disproportionate to the sittuation. Right now, my summer plans seem completely fluid. I may be doing the Medieval Studies program at Cambridge, if I get an internship, and if I don't get an internship, I may be doing another program earlier in the summer at Cambridge, provided that there are still spots open, and if that doesn't pull through, I'll hopefully be taking classes at one of the colleges in New York, or elsewhere theoretically. Okay. All of this is purely theoretical. Which is my issue in the first place.

...I'm fairly sure this isn't a very healthy outlook on life. I'm going to have to get over this whole fear-of-the-undecided thing at some point.

Also, I got a B on a paper for Russian History. Not terrible, but it sort of dampens the sort of "I-can-do-anything" high I've been on for the past few weeks. Honestly, I wasn't expecting a fantastic grade on this one, seeing as I really don't know much about this period of Russian history, and have less outside information to draw on for these things. But still. And I don't mean for this to sound as if I'm saying that because I got one B, I'm having a mental break-down... my expectations aren't that high. Okay, that's a lie, my expectations are that high, but that's not the point. My point is that I'm not especially bothered by the grade. It just happened to come at a point when I'm worrying about whether or not I'm going to get an internship or not, and...

...anyway. Basically, I'm stressing myself about something I have no real reason to be stressing about. I think. I hope. I've also noticed a decreasing tolerance for socialization. As it currently stands, I'm hiding in my upcoming essays, and refusing to talk to anybody I don't need to.

...yeah. Moving on. It's a good thing Spring break is in two days.

Things have been pretty alright, other than everything I just talked about. The semester has been fairly easy in terms of workload, which I have greatly enjoyed rubbing in the faces of all my science-major friends. Which is pretty much all my friends, actually... Anyway. One of the great benefits of being a history major is that the only homework I ever get consists of reading and writing. Occasionally, it requires reading quite a bit, and writing quite a bit. Obviously, I understate. But it's really quite nice for somebody who enjoys that sort of thing, and especially nice for somebody who enjoys it and can do it quite quickly. Thankfully, that's me.

But anyway, that means I've had time to actually go to events and get off of campus a bit...

(Ellie, Sarah, and I at a lacrosse game.)

(...I really don't know how to explain this one.)

...I haven't actually gone anywhere very interesting, other than a Japanese restaurant and the local art supplies store. And my friend Jenny had to drag me out of the library for that trip, so it doesn't really count. I also got dragged out to a lacrosse game somehow... I'm still trying to figure out how that happened. It was fun though. And it took my mind off of a lot of things. Not really, but it helped.

As I mentioned earlier, Spring break is in two days, so hopefully I'll get to slow down and relax a little bit before finishing up the semester. (Yes. Finishing up the semester. I'm amazed that I can even use the phrase, but it's true... my last day is 12 May.) That being said, I don't really want to relax... I just want to get stuff sorted out. As soon as I know what I'm doing this summer, I can relax, but until then, I will continue to worry about it.

Well, sorry about the amount of blabbering in this post. I'll write again soon, and probably from New York!

My love to all,
Tasha

Rousseau, "The Marriage of Figaro," and unseasonably warm weather.

I often wonder why it is those three things (yes. Jean-Jacques Rousseau is now a thing. I'm sure he would have appreciated that.) always seem to coincide in my life... A word of explanation: I'm working on a paper about the Enlightenment for my European History class, which requires me to talk about The Social Contract quite a bit. Actually, I've gotten quite good at it over the three years I've had of European History. I'm listening to Marriage of Figaro (that's rather self-explanatory). And it is 60 F out.

It's fantastic. This is the most content I've been in weeks.

Honestly, I'm starting to think I like talking about the Enlightenment a bit too much. This paper is meant to be 4-6 pages long. It is now 9 pages in length, and I still have to write a conclusion that will be at least two paragraphs long. And there's no way I'm editing out more than I already have.

Anyway. It's a really nice change, especially since the past week has been... less than good. It has been downright dreadful for Kaira. It started with our window shades falling on her and slicing her finger open, and did not end with the stitches ripping.

My side of it hasn't been very interesting... mostly, it consists of some very uncomfortable moments in American History, and agonizing over what should have been a simple paper for said class. Basically, we were meant to write a few pages on early Colonial history based on the statistics she gave us in class. Sounds fairly easy. Should have been very easy.

Unfortunately, I chose the night before it was due to have massive writer's block. Of course I got it done, but I'm not happy with how it turned out. I haven't gotten it back yet, so I don't know for sure how I did, but I'm sure I don't want to know. I'm going to give it to Kaira, and only have her tell me what I got if it was over an 80%.

As for the class itself, I like it... but I'm still getting used to it. I haven't taken the subject in two years, and it definitely shows. Not that this means that I'm not doing well-- most of the people in the class haven't taken a history class at all since high school, and analyzing documents is analyzing documents, no matter where they're from. But it's still a bit awkward when we discuss John Locke, and I'm thinking more about tabula rasa than property rights.

That settles my choice in concentration, I suppose.

In other news... well. I have one part of my summer plan worked out! I am enrolled in Medieval Studies at Cambridge University for this August! I'm just hoping that if I manage to get an internship, it will be one of the internships that is more flexible in terms of timing, or ends before I have to be in the UK... but anyway. At the moment, I'm just very nervous about the internships in general. They tend to be very competitive, and my resume isn't exactly the strongest at this point. Most of my experience is in politics and writing, and my actual jobs have consisted of being a counselor at a day camp, and working at the Goucher stables.

I suppose it could be worse... But I keep wishing I had worked at a museum at some point.

Well. Hopefully, I'll hear something soon, and hopefully it will be good news, so I'll be able to stop worrying and get back to basking in the light of a way-too-warm February and my Dean's List status.

... I'm still a little bit in shock about that. But unfortunately, that hasn't stopped me from bragging to myself every now and then.

That's about it, really. I'll write again as soon as something interesting happens.

My love to all,
Tasha

Cardinals and Snowflakes

Hello again!

Firstly, I saw a snowflake today. Yes. One, single, snowflake. Not much, but it was enough to keep my hopes up for a real winter. Secondly, I just finished my last piece of work for Philosophy EVER. Thirdly, yesterday was my last day of work at the Stables until next semester. So... yes. It's been a good day.

...I've got to figure out what I'm doing over the Winter break. I have a few plans laid out: I'll be visiting Mallorca in January, and I'm really excited about that. Of course, there's the annual Holiday party at home. This will be the first one I haven't been preparing for for months prior with our little a capella group... and there's the obligatory giant get-together with my high school friends. A few of my friends from Goucher may also be coming up for New Year's... so that should be good. But other than that... I mean, it's not like I'm going to have class work to do, or finals to study for. What am I going to do with myself?

A lot of hiking, hopefully. But other than that, I've been attempting to... well. Lots of non-academic projects going on, actually. A list might be the best format...

1. I'm trying to get a jump start on Arabic (which I will be taking at some point) by teaching myself the Arabic alphabet. So far, it's going as one would expect it to... slowly. I'm not worried, as I taught myself Elvish in the space of two weeks over the summer. If I can teach myself a made-up language in two weeks, then I can figure out a real one in the space of a few months.

2. I'm teaching myself basic Egyptian hieroglyphics. Which is exactly as practical as it sounds. Which is not at all. But it's a lot of fun, and the way I see it, if I get an internship at the Metropolitan Museum of Art (which is what I'm trying to do, but more on that later), I can hang out in the Egyptian Art section and try reading the 'glyphs for myself.

3. Applying for internships. My most ambitious is the Metropolitan Museum of Art. It's unlikely I'll get this one, since they want college juniors and seniors, and one question on the application concerns how many languages one speaks...

...er... how about (barely) fluent English, basic and very slow Spanish, random phrases in Elvish (plus the Quenya alphabet), half the Arabic alphabet, and some random Egyptian hieroglyphs?

Not gonna work.

Seriously, though. I'm suffering from a bit of... how do I even describe this? "Language anxiety?" I don't know. But everytime I let myself sit around and think for too long, I start worrying that I don't know enough languages, or the right ones. Which is a competely valid worry, thank you very much. I keep telling myself I'm gonna really get down to work on my Spanish (I'm saving up for a Rosetta Stone program for Spanish, to help me practice and hopefully, get me beyond kindergarden level), and that I'm gonna try to teach myself Arabic/German/French (any of those, depending on what mood I'm in that week), but... urgh. Maybe I am worrying about it too much. Probably not though.

Anyway, I'm also looking at an internship at the Archaeological Department at Colonial Williamsburg, which I think would be... well. Pretty perfect. Colonial American and British History are my favorite areas of study, and I'm curious about Archaeology as a study... AND, the College of William and Mary is literally right there if I want to take classes and get some credits out of the way.

I'm also looking at internships at the Museum of the City of New York (where I saw a great exhibit on Dutch New York a while back), and at Mount Vernon (George Washington's home and plantation).

4. Knitting myself a sweater. It's the first time I've ever actually tried to follow a pattern, and it's coming... slowly, but well enough. I only work on it when I have nothing else to do (which is pretty rarely), so... yep.

Anyway.

Not much more to talk about... except... well. Okay. My friend Chris and I are thinking about getting a pet shark.

...yes. A pet shark. The ones we were looking at grow to 14 inches long.

In any case, I'm just thinking about it. It started out as just his pet shark, and I was gonna get him a tank for Christmas, but if we decided to share the shark, and split all the costs, it would probably be a bit more beneficial for both of us... and more fun. (Come on. Who doesn't want to be able to say they have a pet shark?)

Well, I'll keep you up to date on that. And... that's about it. I'll write again soon.

Love to all,
Tasha